what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

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What is 0+0? 0, I am not dumb

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

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A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? NOT SALLYYYY

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A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

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learn the ropes?

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A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

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Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

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Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its dopaminergic neurons fired synchronously across the synapses of its caudate nucleus, triggering motor contractions propelling the organism forward, while emitting 'cluck' distress signals, to a goal predetermined by its hippocampal road mappings.

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Oh, I must be hearing things.

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what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

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Why was the baby ant confused? Because his uncles were ants

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Me: I have a great knock knock joke but you have to start it off. You: Knock knock Me: who's there? You: silence as the person is confused as what's going on

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding multiple worms in your apple

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What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

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why did one crayon give another crayon the silent treatment? because they are crayons, unable to speak

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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A. Knock Knock B. Welcome!

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I have Alzheimer. What?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops