A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic with a family of four and is ruining his life. -Tag

What did the father say to his daughter? "I'm going to rape you."

b r o k e n k e y b o a r d ! ! p l e a s e h e l p ! ! ! ! !

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, due to the lack of details, there could be many reasons, such as the possibility that there was a cornfield on the other side, he got scared by a loud noise behind him and ran across the street, or just plain old curiosity, but whatever it may be, right now, we do not know the cause.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs go for christmas? Cancer

What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

Roses are black, violets are black, we are all black Shit i'm colour blind

Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

SINCE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY READING THIS, IT WILL GET THE MOST LIKES!!!!!

What do you call someone who kills black people? A hero.

A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

Why was the young girl? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

What's the difference between Rebecca black and your mom? Capitalize Black.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

What did Jim say to Bob? Hi Bob.

A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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