Want to here a joke? Then get off this site!

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

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What's another word for a priest? Rapist

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Why is Kony hated by the kid with ADHD? Hey look a kid being raped while watching his family getting killed.

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What did the widow get for her birthday? Nothing from her husband.

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Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

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Your mama so fat she is physically larger than other people.

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A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

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vagina, hehehehehehehe

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what is the vent wound on the ladies that can never heal???

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Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

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if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

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Why did the parrot fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

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Take off your shoes.

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Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

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Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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What did the colonel say to the soldier before he got into the army tank? Get in.

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Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

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a blind man walks across a road. he's dead

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How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

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what's the difference between a car and a pile of dead babies? nothing, they're both overused anti jokes.

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Q: what is long hard and full of seamen A: a submarine

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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