what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

thumb_up thumb_down -4

My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the man say to the homeless child. Where's you parents?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green and has wheels? A chinese race car driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than a bee sting? - Two bee stings Whats worse than two bee stings? -The Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? -Three bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sex. That is all.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Once upon a time.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a teacher that gets wasted? A wasted teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red Violets are penis

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Will you marry me?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what kind of panda eats leaves? the gray one :D

thumb_up thumb_down -22

You might be a redneck if you are a an uneducated white farm laborer from the south.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

man: so where did you two meet? man tied to flower: in the produce section.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops