"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

Robert Muldoon: "Clever girl..." Velociraptor: "I appreciate your compliment, but I will still eat your face."

why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

How are this and that alike? They aren't.

A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

a black man pays his child support

Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...