This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

You'er moma is so stupied that she climbed over the glass window to see what on the other side

What's funnier than shooting a moose? The realization that the moose was Sarah Jessica Parker...

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Banana you glad I didn't say 'Orange?'"

What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

Blah blah something about Ryan Dunn.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

Why didn't the black lady become a doctor? After being awarded a Guggenheim Achievement Grant for film, she decided rather than going to school for her doctorate to instead spend time traveling in India, doing service work with the country's rather large homeless population.

Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

roses are red vilest are blue shes mine and if you take my place my fist will go in your face

How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

Why did the Soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin in the air.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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