Read a Book.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops