If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

yo mamas so young shes gonna b born soon

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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