Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

a person who will soon die of beeties

Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

How do you get a black guy to learn how to read? Find a stolen book and tell them that it's the recipe for the spices in fried chicken.

Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

Peas

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

What happened to the lady? She queefed.

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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