What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

Say you are caught in a net with 10 other people in said net at a construction site. A pair of scissors are right next to you and everyone said to use the scissors. But instead of using the scissors, you use your teeth in risk of a broken tooth.

What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

Why so serious ?

The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion? Answer- Take me to your weeder!

a man walked into a bar and said ow

What page are you on The gay page.

womens rights.

My mom says to me are you gay and i say are you gay (What did i just do)

What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...