Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

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What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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How do you make a Flamingo cry? Hit it with a sledgehammer.

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops