Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

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u know whats a crime? rape

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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