A man goes to the store to buy a kitten. While there, he decides to buy two because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

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A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She didn't have a dog.

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Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

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Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

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how many members of the australian greens party does it take to write legislation? none, it's already been done for them by Karl Marx

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Why does a woman with a little dark skin and black hair a Native American? Because she smells.

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whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

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What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

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How long does it take a blonde to skrew in a light bulb? Any amount of time; given that she knows that said bulb is in need of replace meant, or that said blonde is disabled, or if you thought I would make some kind of funny blonde joke that you would tell your friend and then forget ten minutes later, only to think of it a day later and claim it as your own.

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Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

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Why are Chinese women such bad drivers? Only company executives are fortunate enough to own cars in communist China. Furthermore, women are still in a subordinate class in many Eastern societies.

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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TRICERATOPS!

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I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

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Mike and Richard were walking down the street together Richard left because of Mike's garlic breath

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

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an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops