What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

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Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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