Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

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When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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Death by kayak

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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Why did Jimmy not go to school? Because Jimmy, along with his family, were killed in a horrible house fire. Knock Knock? Who's there? Not Jimmy...

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Cripples are lame.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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What is the weirdest way to get AIDS Having Sex

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a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

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How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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