what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

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what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

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Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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