What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

Why didn't the ghost go to the dance? He didn't exist.

A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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