My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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-Why did the jewish man chase after the penny? -Because he's poor and needs to feed his starving family.

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

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why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

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eh

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

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What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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