I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

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What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

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Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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two scientists line up a frog at a line and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off one front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off the other front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off a rear leg and tell it to jump it jumps 2 feet they cut off its last leg and tell it to jump it doesn't move they tell it to jump again it doesn't move the scientists come to a conclusion: frogs with no legs...cant hear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops