A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

What's brown and sticky? Feces.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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