A- Why did the chicken cross the road? B- I honestly do not care.

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

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What do you call a exceptionally funny anti joke? Well, usually cruel and extremely vile.

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

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A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

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Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

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What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

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Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

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Why did the girl stop smoking? Because her mum asked her to.

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops