Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

Why did the blonde stay in the five-star hotel? She had enough money.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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