Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

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your mom.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Ehh

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

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What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

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What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops