A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

Whats black and yellow and is funny when its falling off a cliff? A bus full of niggers.

Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

An American, Mexican, and Chinese men are each asked to throw something off a cliff that they have too much of. The Chinese threw off rice. The Mexican threw off tacos. And the Americans.. Well.. They threw off the Mexicans.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

Whats green? Mountain Dew.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

Excuses are like assholes: Gay men like to have sex with them.

sky silverstein

hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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