A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down -16

your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why are white people white? I don't know

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

thumb_up thumb_down -16

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops