what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

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what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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WHAT HAS MAN BOOBS THE SIXE OF JUPITER BOMBER NEVILLE

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

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My favorite part of the movie Frozen is when the parents die.

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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your momma's so ugly that she currently deals with an overwhelmingly self consciousness view of her appearance to the point where she has contemplated suicide and it is in your best interest to seek her medical help in order to preserve her heath and overall well being.

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what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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