Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Poop

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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