what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

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Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

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Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Why was the man burying his child? because in france, fishing is only allowed 3 times a day

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Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

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Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

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What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

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Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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