What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

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Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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What do you call someone who's sad? A depressed person

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A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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