If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

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What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it slipped from his hand.

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Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

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What do a Mexican and a elephant have in common? Aside from the fact they're both alive beings, they share the same kingdom, phylum, class and the fact of both being alive beings, each other are in constant contact with the environment, they both share affectionate ties with partners of their species, being them from the same family, breeding partner ou even just alive beings of the same especies of each one.

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What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back. Then look down and realize there's still an active grenade in your hand. You've just become the joke

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Roses are green violets are brown wait a minute..........my shoes untied

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? no... Well, It's really nice. :)

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Bible Games aka Bible Buffet: SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Sometime after the death and return of Superma... Jesus. God: RAISE FROM YOUR GRAVE! Jesus slays holy white beasts: POWER UP! POWER UP! HOMO UP! Uh did he say homo u... ARGH! CANNOT CONTAIN LEVEL OF HOMO! TURNING FURFAG/ALTERED BEAST. A wild Saten appears!: WELCOME TO YOUR DOOM! Jesus used gay wolf punch, it was not very effective... wild Saten uses OMFG HE TEARS OFF HIS OWN HEAD AND THROWS IT AT JESUS! Its super effective! Jesus Dies. Moral: Second coming? He came back to meet his disciples and crap AFTER quoting "ill be back", did he promise some third coming? Is that why people have been waiting for over 2000 years? :P

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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