your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

Cleveland sports, lebron james' ever receding hairline

Why did Billy fall off the tree? Why? Because he had no arms or legs. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy

How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

why did the old man lose his hair Because he had cancer and needed kimmo therapy

I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...