A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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Steve Jobs is alive.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

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- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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