Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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