Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

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Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? Because they kept saying Bach bach Bach. No. Beethoven was deaf. He couldnt understand what they were saying.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

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Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

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A guy walks into a bar

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

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What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops