Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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What's the difference between Justin Beiber and gay people? Quite a bit, actually, because Justin Beiber is one person, and "gay people" is a community.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

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Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

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In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

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A Chinese man fails a math test

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Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops