Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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time to spruce up!

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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What's living, purple, yellow, and green? Nothing.

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops