Q: How do you eat a dead baby? A: One piece at a time.

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

irish man drinking john smiths

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

"Why do children's movies show everything in that happens in the movie in the trailer?" "The same reason I show children everything that's inside of my trailer."

men's rights activists

Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

What's funnier than 24? 25

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

You know what they say about priests with big rosaries? I don't know, it's in Latin.

Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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