Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

a ginger named corey walks into a bad and gets pistol whipped after raping his classmate

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

The fox said to the walrus, "Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!" And the walrus replied, "Goo-Goo-g'joob".

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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