What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

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What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker got for Christmas? He's his dad. He bought the presents.

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

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What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

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why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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a man checks his mypsace

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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