Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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