Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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Wenn Sie dies zu übersetzen, dann ist dein ein Esel

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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why did the white man walk into the bar? He was thirsty

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The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

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A man did not like this site

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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