Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

Arab 1: Du good bai me, and I'll du good bai you. Arab 2: Ye men, sounds good men. Arab 3: O man, no way. Arab 4: K, u wait...jus wait n see.. Arab 5: I no interest! Me so saudi! Arab 6: D'oh...ha, ha, haa! Arab 7: This is so bahrain...I'm going to go club some protesters.

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

no rasist joks

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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