Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

RUN

How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He had no arms Q: Why did the frog fall out of the tree? A: He was stapled to the monkey's face

What did the blind girl say? Its dark in here.

what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

Rock a by baby, In a tree top When the wind blows The cradle will rock, When the bough breaks The cradle will fall And down will come baby Dying on impact.

Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

Why couldnt the pirate get into the movies? Because it was rated pg-13 and his parents didnr likw him watching that

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

Why was the black child found dead in water? He was raped and thrown into a river.

Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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