Wanna hear a joke? no

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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drugs.

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What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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Charlie Sheen

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

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Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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