What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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What's 100 times worse that finding an worm in your Apple listening to Justin B. Sing! :-)

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Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

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A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

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a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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What did the black man say to the Hispanic? Lovely weather we're having.

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Bitch

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

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a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

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Why is the Asian 2nd grader sad? Her best friend was diagnosed with breast cancer. She has 3 weeks to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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