Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

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two japanese men walk into a bar. the first japanese man says “i am japanese!” the second japanese man says “i am also japanese!” the bartender then says “well, hey. i’m japanese too”. the bar was in japan.

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Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

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Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

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How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

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An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

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Yes

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Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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