Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

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What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple??? You... Lol jk no there could be alot of things like getting raped, the holocaust, me killing your children i mean someone killing your children. Because if it was me you would know it was me and file a report and i would be arrested and be sent to jail. And in jail i would try my hardest to stay alive brcause if i died that would suck. I would also try not to drop the soap beacuse i might get rapped by some prisib mate, also the floors are quite dirty and that would guve me any type of bacteirial infection like the stupid yeats infection or maby the persob who takes it from me when i finnish would get aids cause it dropped on the floor and who knows were it was. Then he would die from aids and his wife and or kids would be sad and set up a funeral were a preist would stand in akward silence cause the guy murderd the preists father so he wouldnt be mean an ruin the funeral but he wouldnt say anything nice. But after the funeral the preist would go back home and smoke a cigarette because he has started an unhealthy habbit just like millions of people around the world. When will people learn that it kills you faster than cancer well some cancers are quite quick and painless like a head tumor. But most tumors are able to be saved because the doctors are smart these days coming from yale or havord universitys and what not. Most peopel want to take the easy way out by just working at kinkos or wallmart. Both jobs are shit wich is why im probably going to go there cause no one else will except me in there offices or departments. I think its the fact i look like a pedofile trying to kill babys but you know how life is short and difficult to control but you have one life why waste it. Stupid emo kids trying to cut emselfs and shoot themselfs so they dont have to deal with theirs or their partners periods because the other day coming back from mc donalds this guy almost hit me with his car and threw a cup at me for some strange reason but hey not my problem unless he was my first victim?...... Lol jk i have never killed anyone and im not that creapy... Awks POTATO!!!

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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