What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

i saw amango it splootered

A girl asks a guy are you finish. The guy says no I'm British.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

Why did the little girl fall of the swingset. She got kidnapt and raped by a giant scorpion.

why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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