What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

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What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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How do you survive the end of the world? You can't- everyone will die!

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

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whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy there were skid marks in front of the dead dog

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Holocast ...

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You know what's funny? A well told joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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