There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? were lawyers

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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