how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A cowboy walks in to a bar and says to the guy behind the counter "Can I have a glass of water?". The bar tender shot a gun and missed the cowboy by an inch. The cowboy said thanks. Why? Because the cowboy had the hiccups

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats the worst kind of homework? child abuse

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

daughter: Mum why do I have a brother mum: He not your real brother dont worry your adopted :) daughter: :'(

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

You know what's a real drag? A club foot

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you stop a air plane? You throw small infants into the turbine.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

thumb_up thumb_down -3

*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops