What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

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What's the difference between jokes and anti-jokes? Anti-jokes aren't funny.

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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