When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange and Banana Orange and Banana who? ... The man opened the door and saw a bowl of oranges and bananas.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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An elephant walks into a bar. It was so big that it broke a lot of things.

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

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Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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