Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops