Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

69.

Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

I have a dirty joke. Poop.

What did the gay black man say after JFK was shot? Wow thats really sad but I have such an appetite right now so i should probably go to eat.

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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