A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

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What do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? A surgeon.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill!

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whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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What's black and yellow and flies? I dont know.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

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Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

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Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops