Why is mario red? His mother beat him as a child.

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How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

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oh my god! what? i heard this joke the other day and it was hilarious. ok, tell me? actually it doesn't matter i can't remember anyway.

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What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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KKK: Hey i was just comming over here to invite you to a church gathering me and my buddies are having later on tonight, and afterwards we are going to have a big bon-fire to fire up our spirits. Black guy: OK sounds great. White people sure are nice now-a-days.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eric, your old high school pal! Eric, you slept with my wife 3 years ago. You have her, please stop coming to my door and please stop saying your my pal. Pals don't sleep with other guys' wives.

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Why is Obama Care a lie? Cuz he doesn't care!

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Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

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Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: my red painted d*ck

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What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

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Why was the boy crying on his birthday? He was being molested by his birthday clown who he was fully aware was his alcoholic costumed father.... And it wasn't his birthday.

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Jovan

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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