- Anti Joke

So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to, like any other chicken

Knock knock Who’s there? The police, your family was killed in a horrific car crash on highway 22 this morning at 10:15 after they collided head on with a truck. They died instantly if it is any conciliation. We will contact you further into our investigation. Dave then poured himself a whiskey and thought about all the good times he and his family shared, teaching Jessica to ride a bike, his and Kate’s honeymoon in Honolulu, playing catch with Jacob. That’s when the full extremity of the situation hit Dave causing him to break into tears he sat and cried for three hours and fifteen minutes. Once he had gotten that out of his system he decided to visit his mother and tell her the horrible news. Knock Knock Who’s there? Dave Dave who? Again Dave breaks into tears as his grandmothers althsiemers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember her sons name. Feeling shattered he decides not to go through the process of explaining who he is and decides to head to the local pub to drown his sorrows. Bartender: hard day? Dave: my wife and two beautiful children were mauled in a head on collision with a truck and my mother can’t remember who I am. Bartender: yeah sure but was it a hard day? Dumbstruck with this ridiculous remark Dave pauses for a moment. The bar is silent only the sounds of bottles clinking and feet tapping on bar stools can be heard. Cigarette smoke hangs in the air. Dave stares at the bartender momentarily then throws his bottle at him send him off balance Dave then grabs the shot gun he knows the bartender keeps behind the counter and shoots the bartender at point blank range. Some customers run scared witless other try to control Dave but only end up in the same position as the bartender. Dave is left standing in a pool of blood. The smell of death hangs in the air with the cigarette smoke. Feeling slightly better Dave heads home and kills himself. Dave was an excellent plumber we will miss him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

ugvvvvvv

Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black