Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

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What did the duck wear to go swimming? A bathingsuit!

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What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

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This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

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What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

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In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from a Black family reunion.

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

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Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops