Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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What body part did German prince Heinrich von Missingpenis lack? His toenail.

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A man was complaining about not getting enough sleep. He was then raped.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

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Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

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yo mammas so fat when she gets cut gravy pours out

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

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Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is nonsentient, generally heavier and not necessarily light-dark brown colored, whereas the black man is fully capable of thinking and usually has dark toned skin.

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what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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What's did the white man say to the black man? Howdy.

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Mack: Hello Jonathan: Hi Mack: My name is Mack, what's your name? Jonathan: My name is Billy Mack: You liar! I'm reading this post at anti-joke.com and whenever you reply, your name shows Johnathan! Johnathan: Well Mack, I guess you broke the 4th wall. By the way, this joke is over in 3, 2, 1...

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What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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yo mama's so fat because when women are pregnet thay gain weight for there child to feed on

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What's the best Anti-Joke ever? I don't know, but it's NOT this one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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